Funny Quotes about Police
• “Most of my relatives are police marksmen, apart from my granddad who was a bank robber. He died recently, surrounded by his family.” —Milton Jones
• A casino in South Dakota was robbed by a man dressed as a mummy. The police described the suspect as anywhere between 25 and 8,000 years old.” —Craig Ferguson
• Every group of brothers should have at least one white guy in it. I’m serious for safety, cuz when the shit goes down someone is gonna need to talk to the police.” —Dave Chappelle
• If you’re being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They’re trained for that! — Milton Jones
• In England, if you commit a crime, the police don’t have a gun and you don’t have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say “Stop, or I’ll say stop again.” —Robin Williams
• They’re so broke that they’ve actually cut essential services. In many places, they’ve cut policemen, because, who the fuck needs them? Or firemen, son of a bitch, it’s much more fun watching something burn down.” —Richard Pryor
• There are three states of legality in Irish law. There is all this stuff which comes under That’s grand, then it moves into Ah now don’t push it, and finally it comes under Right now you’re taking the piss, and that’s when the police come in.” —Dara O Briain
• The government hates rap. That’s why they don’t arrest anybody that kills rappers! Only the good ones are dead, man! Only the good ones: Biggie dead, Tupac dead, Vanilla Ice still alive! They don’t fill out a police report. They don’t even have a chalk line when it’s a dead rapper, they just take a piss around the body.” —Chris Rock
• Is it just me, or is he the greasiest nigga you ever seen in your life? Every time Jermaine comes on, I gotta wipe the grease off the screen! Can’t see shit! Jermaine must have been on. Even the police can’t catch his ass, ’cause every time they try, he just slips out! They be like, “Somebody throw some sand on that nigga! Please!” —Chris Rock
Inspirational Police Quotes
• “Hire character. Train skill.” —Peter Schutz
• “Heroes don’t always wear capes.” —Unknown
• “In this family, no one fights alone.” —Unknown
• “Cops work for a cause, not applause.” —Unknown
• “When you think about quitting, remember why you started.” —Unknown
• “Real heroes die serving the law, not resisting it.” —Unknown
• “Evil is powerless if the good are unafraid.” —President Ronald Reagan
• “Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.” —Publilius Syrus
• “There is no elegant way to protect sheep from hungry wolves.” —Unknown
• “Do what you can with all you have, wherever you are.” —Theodore Roosevelt
• “Blessed are the peacekeepers, for they shall be called the children of God.” —Matthew 5:9
• “A society which chooses war against the police better learn to make peace with its criminals.” —Unknown
• “The wicked flee when no man pursueth; but the righteous are bold as a lion.” —Proverbs 28:1
• “A police force, wherever they are, is made up of amazing people, and I respect them a great deal.” —Nancy McKeon
• “People sleep peacefully in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.” —George Orwell
• “When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” —Henry Ford
• “Down these mean streets a man must go who is not himself mean, and who is neither tarnished nor afraid.” —Raymond Chandler
• “A true police officer fights not because he hates what’s in front of him, but because he loves who stands behind him.” —Unknown
• “I prefer peace, but if trouble must come, let it come in my time so that my children can live in peace.” —Unknown
• “Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.” —George Orwell
• “Society questions the police and their methods, and the police say, Do you want the criminals off the street or not?” —Kurt Russell
• “And maybe remind the few, if ill of us they speak, that we are all that stands between the monsters and the weak.” —Michael Mark
• “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” —Maya Angelou
• “My heroes are those who risk their lives every day to protect our world and make it a better place – police, firefighters, and members of the armed forces.” —Sidney Sheldon
• “The duties of an officer are the safety, honor, and welfare of your country first; the honor, welfare, and comfort of the men in your command second; and the officer’s own ease, comfort, and safety last.” —George S. Patton
• “Law enforcement officers are never ‘off duty.’ They are dedicated public servants who are sworn to protect public safety at any time and place that the peace is threatened. They need all the help that they can get.” —Barbara Boxer
• “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to make the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” —Michael Jordan
• “The police are the public and the public are the police; the police being only members of the public who are paid to give full time attention to duties which are incumbent on every citizen in the interests of community welfare and existence.” —Robert Peel
• “What most people do not understand is that you could be the biggest thug that ever existed but if you needed help, I would be there. I will show up when your friends won’t – or if they run away. I work with brace men and women who do the same. We go. We help. It is what we do.” —Police Officer Andrew Laurinec
• “I’m the police, and I’m here to arrest you. You’ve broken the law. I did not write the law. I may even disagree with the law but I will enforce it and no matter how you plead, congol, beg, or attempt to stir my sympathies, nothing you do will stop me from placing you in steel cage with grey bars. If you run away, I will chase you. If you fight me, I will fight back. If you shoot at me, I will shoot back. By law I am unable to walk away. I am a consequence. I am the unpaid bill. I am fate with a badge and a gun. Behind my badge is a heart like yours. I bleed, I think, I love, and yes, I can be killed. And although I am but one man, I have thousands of brothers and sisters who are the same as me. They will lay down their lives for me, and I them. We stand watch together, a thin blue line, protecting the prey from the predators, the good from the bad. We are the police.” —Officer Taylor
Quotes about Police Courage
• “Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak. Courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.” —Winston Churchill
• If the City Council wants to hold the police accountable, it has the subpoena power and oversight responsibility to do so. They don’t have the courage to do it.” —Sal Albanese
Quotes about Brave Police Officers
• In my opinion, New York City police officers are brave.” —Heath Ledger
• We also have to recognize, in addition to the challenges that we face with policing, there are so many good, brave police officers who equally want reform.” —Hillary Clinton
• I think we take for granted police officers and detectives that walk into some pretty heinous situations, and they really have to be very brave. So I love playing a character that’s very brave – someone that kind of dives in the fire to figure out what’s happened.” —George Eads
Mahatma Gandhi Quotes About Police
• Democracy and dependence on the military and police are incompatible.” —Mahatma Gandhi
• No police or military in the world can protect people who are cowards.” —Mahatma Gandhi
• Whilst power, superimposed, always needs the help of the police and the military, power generated from within should have little or no use of them.” —Mahatma Gandhi
• No police officer could compel a satyagrahi to give evidence against a person who has confessed to him. A satyagrahi would never be guilty of a betrayal of trust.” —Mahatma Gandhi
Police Quotes from Movies
“A policeman’s work is never done.” —MARGARET RUTHERFORD – Miss Marple
“Listen, we got a problem. A DEAproblem.” —BRYAN CRANSTON – Walter White
“Who is the boss? The cop or the law?” —CHARLTON HESTON – Mike Vargas
“A policeman’s job is only easy in a police state.” —CHARLTON HESTON – Mike Vargas
“We’re not just black, we’re cops too! We’ll pull ourselves over later!” —MARTIN LAWRENCE – Marcus
“The freak with the top hat is leaving with the basketball.” —STACY KEACH – The Narcs: Sergeant Stedenko
“You can’t fire white folk. You fire white folk, you’d best believe somebody gettin’ shot that day.” —D.L. HUGHLEY – D.L. Hughley
“If you got rid of every cop with vaguely racist leanings, then you’d have three cops left, and all o’ them are gonna hate the fags, so what are ya gonna do, y’know?” —WOODY HARRELSON – Willoughby
“There’s a reason you separate military and the police. One fights the enemies of the state, the other serves and protects the people. When the military becomes both, then the enemies of the state tend to become the people.” —EDWARD JAMES OLMOS – Admiral William Adama
Police Quotes and Sayings
• “A really good detective never gets married.” —Raymond Chandler
• “Even the police have an unlisted number.” —Morey Amsterdam
• “Police do not belong in war zones.” —Daniel Keys Moran
• “There is nothing more unaesthetic than a policeman.” —Arthur Conan Doyle
• “The police must obey the law while enforcing the law.” —Earl Warren
• “The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government.” —P. Chidambaram
• “It’s a lot of crooked cops out there. They manipulate the system.” —Ludacris
• “Police are reluctant to label a murder as a possible serial homicide.” —Pat Brown
• “We must always remember that the police are recruited from the criminal classes.” —Gore Vidal
• “The police are not here to create disorder, they’re here to preserve disorder.” —Richard J. Daley
• “In almost all cases now the police are as much an enemy as the others.” —Tom Metzger
• “Federal authorities do not have the manpower or the resources to protect America’s international borders.” —John Culberson
• “In America, the policeman is a working-class hero. In England, the policeman is a working-class traitor.” —Martin Amis
• “When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car.” —Reese Witherspoon
• “The art of the police is not to see what it is useless that it should see.” —Napoleon Bonaparte
• “It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be.” —Steven Seagal
• “It is the duty of every good officer to obey any orders given him by his commander-in-chief.” —Nathan Hale
• “A police force, wherever they are, is made up of amazing people, and I respect them a great deal.” —Nancy Mckeon
• “Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray.” —Arik Matson
• “The police feel that most of the public are against them and that there is a lot of bad feeling.” —Peter James
• “The policemen or soldiers are only a gun in the establishment’s hand. They make the racist secure in his racism.” —Huey Newton
• “To call the police is a really big deal because you don’t snitch – that’s the culture you grow up in.” —Sonja Sohn
• “If only the authorities could be made to realize that the forces leading them on in the armament race are just insane.” —Alva Myrdal
• “I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men.” —Clement Freud
• “If police officers routinely issue tickets for the most serious traffic offenses, they’ll be treating drivers of all races, sexes, and ages equally.” —Bill Dedman
• “Surely the fact that a uniformed police officer is wearing his hair below his collar will make him no less identifiable as a policeman.” —Thurgood Marshall
• “When you have police officers who abuse citizens, you erode public confidence in law enforcement. That makes the job of good police officers unsafe.” — Mary Frances Berry
• “Policemen so cherish their status as keepers of the peace and protectors of the public that they have occasionally been known to beat to death those citizens or groups who question that status.” —David Mamet
• “The duties of an officer are the safety, honor, and welfare of your country first; the honor, welfare, and comfort of the men in your command second; and the officer’s own ease, comfort, and safety last.” —George S. Patton
• “Law enforcement officers are never ‘off duty.’ They are dedicated public servants who are sworn to protect public safety at any time and place that the peace is threatened. They need all the help that they can get.” —Barbara Boxer